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Saturday, April 3, 2010

As promised, I will update my dear readers about my life in Dunedin. My easy life ended after lecture commenced. As God loves me too much, he places me in a group (Pharmacy second year students are allocated into four groups, with different laboratory sessions) that timetable is occupied with five labs every fortnight. Situation become worse with tests and assignments that all counted for final marks.

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Above are the pictures taken when New Zealand Army starting a procession. In fact. I am not clear about the reason they had this procession. I was on duty at a checkpoint in conjunction with treasure hunt organised for Malaysian sponsored students.

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This is a plant that fascinates biology students a lot – it is God’s work (genetics) that allow all three colour tones appear in the same plant. For all the University of Otago’s students, you can see this tree on your way from Toroa to St David.

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View outside my flat. I miss the sun a lot nowadays. As I am solar-powered, I need sunlight to keep me alive (sounds like photosynthetic animal).

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My first (and maybe last) dispensing jacket with details of the buttons. Even though I do not like to wear the jacket, but I love the practical works during dispensing lab. It makes me feel alive apart from the usual lectures of hardly visible drug molecules.



Shark warning bell is definitely a new thing for Malaysians. This is located in St Clair beach.





I got a little bit of sunburn from this trip to St Clair. As lecture has not commenced at that time, I have quite some good time with new Toroans (Toroa International House residents).

As I am on Easter Break now, so I will come out with some brand new updates soon, not like this one that is already aged. I bow to you, my dear readers who are still supporting me, despite my long absence.

1:48 AM


Looking at the digital numbers behind clear screen of my watch, it has been a full month that I abandoned my readers. I apologise for my long absence. I always think to write, but timetable of a second year pharmacy course never let me do so. I was always exhausted from reading and ‘testing’ and only casual gaming during weekends.
Anyway, I am back! I may break a month’s account into several parts, before my dear readers stuff to death (maybe bored to death).
Aerial view of Malaysia. Organised structures and buildings.
Cotton outside the plane.
More cotton, ha3!
Little waterfall in ‘Butterfly Garden’ in Singapore Changi Airport. What a tiny airport!
Even beauty will not last…
When flowers do not grow, and butterflies need food…
Interior designs in Changi Airport. I have no idea about the purpose of those fin-like structures below the ceiling. Any thermodynamic purpose?
Above are the photos I took during my 14 hours journey back to Dunedin, New Zealand.
My next update will be on my life after I arrived in the wasted land near the south end of the world.

1:44 AM


Saturday, March 6, 2010


Dear Mr. Penis/Dick who dropped a precious little gem of sage wisdom in the cbox. Wouldn’t it be great if your last name was Head? Grow some stones and put your real name in, when you want to shout out and be a smartass. Hi, I’m Jasmine by the way, and I really do love meeting folks who can't help but add witty snippets here and there when they can't find anything else that picks apart an argument.

Does it even matter if he was or wasn’t a foreign student, was that the main point of my argument, was it even a supporting contention anywhere in the whole argument? THAT little piece of shit, my dear idiot anonymous penis friend, does not make or break my argument. Try harder, chump. The whole post wasn’t even about that little titbit of useless information, it merely brought me to another argument about people who want their own laws enforced in lands that aren’t theirs.

Learn to READ before talking shit. I said “Something tells me”, not “I know for a fact that he is”. And was that the best refutation you could try to attack with? Next time come up with something better, especially if you claim I’m an idiot, coz you sure as hell didn’t give anyone a semblance of even the most vague of notions that your intelligence was of any higher quality than that of a head of lettuce.

And congratulations on your soaringly high self-esteem, everyone out there must be absofuckinglutely dying to call themselves “kote”. Your parents must be very proud of you, kote-dude. Oh wait, seeing how horrifyingly anal you are, let me just prepare and lube you up a bit just in case you want another fight. Alright so it was: Kote-dude SLASH... DUDETTE. So there. I’ve acknowledged the fact that SOMETHING TELLS ME that I might be wrong that you are a male. Not that I KNOW FOR A FACT that you are a male.  Does this ring a bell about paying attention before spewing trash?  See, Lessons In Life 101, simple huh?

But on a serious note, thank you for informing me that he wasn’t a foreign student, it just gives me more reason to lose hope in having tolerant open-minded Malaysians in Malaysia. When the US tells M’sia that what it’s doing is wrong, we shout, “This is OUR country, we gained independence from you infidel evil Westerners a long time ago! LEAVE OUR SOVEREIGNTY ALONE!!”. Then when the US/any other nation makes some policies of their own, we’re the first big and mighty nation to yell out and scream in objection, and have boycotts in downright defiance: “TASTE OUR RIGHTEOUS WRATH YOU PIGS!  We the mighty nation shall stand in your way of economic development, by not buying all products that might represent an amount probably equivalent to 0.000000025% of your nation's GDP!!”!! And show them who knows how to handle global politics the right way. Unfortunately the only ones who hear our little leaders shouting away are the people who tune into TV1, TV2 and TV3. Sorry guys, CNN has bigger issues and ideas to cover.

12:39 AM


Saturday, December 12, 2009

oih hello. i know long since i post anything. its not that i dont remember any of u guys (which i do miss all the time) its just im so lazy to post anything. hee. how is everyone doing. seems like everybody is doing well (thru facebook) la. but well, there's of course the ups n downs in study. haish~ im pretty much doing ok in india. having fun as much as i could but most of the time struggling with the hectic schedule :) which is so not fun when u only have one day of weekend.
well, im just dropping by to say that i really miss everyone so much n things have been so different witout u guys around. love lots, bella.

10:29 AM


Wednesday, December 2, 2009


Foundations of biochemistry

53 C-

Foundations of epidemiology

64 C+
HUBS192 Human body systems 2 68 B-


Above table shows my final exam results. I know it is ugly, but there should be no secret in this world. Besides, this is what I deserved after such hard work. Studying until late at night and cracking head for all those “crazy” questions (not all, but some) did not pass me to the 70 cut-off point intended. I know dad is very disappointed, and I may drag him down to this dark water (he is my guarantor), but I can do nothing to change.

Those 12A1’s during SPM are useless for life. I love biology and anatomy, just as my result shows (biology and anatomy is always highest mark I can get). I love it not because it is easy to study (it is among the hardest subjects for most), but biology is the only subject I can see and analyse. It is the subject that really open my mind and heart towards God.

There are a few “choices” available for me now, even though I already decided which path to walk down. I know I do not have, and will not have money to pay back Malaysian government. Then, I hope I will be permitted to continue my degree in Bachelor of Sciences – Anatomy and Structural Biology I guess. I do not want to talk about other paths, just to tell I will not back off or withdraw anyway.

To all my supporters, I apologise to disappoint you all. Please help me again, pray for me. Thank you all for being so supportive along the period.

5:57 AM


Friday, September 11, 2009

Nothing personal Loh.

Firstly, to put it so generally, that America treats all Muslims like terrorists because it does not understand Islam, is too much of an idealistic way to look at the situation when you think in terms of ways to implement practical and efficient security measures to safeguard your nation.

And to say those bastards with no regard for the lives and loves of others, are not Muslims, because they do not truly understand the religion, you yourself are conducting your thoughts in the same way as a Taliban village council member would. It is a convenient way to shrug these menaces to society by just saying, "Oh no...You guys got it wrong, we're not associated with them even though we fall under the same banner! Please don't clump me with them!". Unfortunately, who is to decide who's religion is which, if not the person embracing the faith himself. It's like saying those who participated in The Inquisition weren't Catholics because "mainstream Catholicism", whatever that might mean, doesn't condone what they did. You have no right to say that what they believe in is wrong or a perversion of the truth, because if you do, so do they (which most already do because of their backward mentality – and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to lower yourself to thir standards). They carry out executions summarily, under the guise of a Muslim 'brother/sister' being a heretic, or having been diverted from the 'true path' of what is supposed to be believed.

You can say Muslims are not the only ones who commit atrocities - look at daily incidences of fathers, mothers, sons and daughters, husbands and wives, killing each other for various reasons incomprehensible. Or cases of serial killers who commit gruesome and despicable crimes, whether against minors or prostitutes.

The DIFFERENCE between the majority of those killers and majority of the Muslim terrorists is:
Most of these killers (who are not diagnosed with some psychopathic tendencies anyway) DO NOT proclaim their work to have been done in the name of God. Sure you get the occasional “I heard the Voice of God and the divine chorus of angels whispering to me to slit her throat.”. But you don’t find many groups and agglomerations of people willing to commit murder indiscriminately even to the point of killing members from their own faith just to create some chaos or receive some political attention, who claim they are doing it in the name of God. Mainly, you find them in the current world, as Muslims. The Inquisition had its days, so did the Serbs, and the Crusades. But at this point in time this is what we have to deal with.

I cannot understand your rationale which runs in a roundabout concerning invasion:

When the World Trade Centre collapsed to ashes, nightmare not only haunted Americans, yet citizens in Middle East. Warfare civilians may ask, “Are we the ones that do wrong?” Since then, America treats Muslims like all are terrorist. America does not understand Islam. America is too arrogant in solving international tension. If invasion is allowed in country suspected with terrorism, why cannot other countries invade America? America thought they are civilised, but only barbarians love war.
First of all I really don’t think the mother and fathers, sisters and brothers in the doomed towers even had the chance to ask “Are we the ones that do wrong?”. It is easy to blur the lines between Bush’s vested interests in Iraq that ran through from Bush Sr.’s days, and Bin Laden’s tailor-made nightmare. The war in Iraq has nothing to do with 9/11.  Both of them may be viewed as criminals but that's beside the point. Bush Jr. might have ploughed into Iraq while, (to put it at best) casually disregarding any 'collateral damage' or 'casualties of war'. But he sure as hell didn't spend tens of billions of dollars just to go out there to a fuck-ass barren land and set his troops up in unfamiliar territory and "Awww he-ye-ll shoot up somma the-ye-m Eye-rack-ey folks just for shee-yi-ts and giggles!!". He might have had vested interests running about oil, past grudges carried over from Daddy-o, and who knows what else. And people who say America was just looking for a place to carry out target practice and combat training? Yeah that's some special training for troops. "Hmm let's see, just spin this globe, and hey where the hell is this?! I...ra..q, Alright... Let's roll, boys!" Please.

Either way, the troops weren't set on shooting down just anyone, walking on the streets without a gun or reason for suspicion. People who were killed might have been shot down by nervous, inexperienced, wary, weary and/or psychologically disturbed boys who most certainly would have feared for their lives or those of their comrades, had they not immediately acted. Some might have been shot on reflex, or on mistaken instincts, and misinterpretation of actions and intentions of the civilians. Others might have been killed in bombing runs or patrols, due to GROSS errors in operation planning and execution. The Bush Admin may have turned a blind eye toward the cases, but it is so improbable that the planned mission objectives were set out to kill them and that any missions were accomplished in any way through those incidents. But Bin Laden concocted his little solution of evil and went straight out to KILL CIVILIANS, WITH PLANES FULL OF CIVILIANS. IT WAS IN NO WAY ERRONEOUS TO HAVE SENT THE PLANES INTO THE TOWERS. Can you say fucking pile of scum?

For one thing, it is easy to see how 2 shitty terms of the Bush administration has left a bitter taste due to pursuing the War in Iraq which had at best, shaky foundations and vested interests from generations past. But are you saying that America is comparable to Pakistan, which is festering with small isolated religious madrasahs – some of which serve as centers for the propagation of extremism and the induction into fanatical groups - teaching young boys that violence against women and creating terror worldwide is condoned by obscure and highly selective religious texts? That Pakistan should have the right to say "We are invading you because you are suspected of terrorism!"? Yeah, I’ll bet, the one thing Pakistan should know best about is terrorism itself.

To say that only barbarians love war, I find that to be an extremely fun idea actually. Are you again passing judgement that America loved war but no one else did? Everyone else was just inadvertently and unwillingly ‘pushed’ into a war they didn’t wanna participate in, and just did because they had no say nor control over their actions? You’ll have to remind yourself that the Greats in your history books: Khalid al-Walid, Muhammad, Saladin. They all participated in wars. And quite successfully, I might add. (Walid supposedly having a track record of never having lost a battle) Does that increase their degree of barbarism due to their victories in a clearly barbaric practice? A lot of massive wars have been fought on the basis of nothing more than religious ideals. My god says this and is bigger and better than yours, you say the same about yours – neither one of us is willing to submit. BOOM!! One way or another. Holy war, genocide, feuds that last for generations, individual prejudices. Some shit is bound to hit the fan.

And somehow, you say that America not understanding Islam is a problem. For one thing, America does have it's share of Muslims, it isn't some hidey-hole ritualistic cult convention that needs to be understood in order for the actions of people claiming to do work in its name to be justified or criticized. If you kill under the banner of some Kabbalah rite or Templar tradition or some long forgotten Sumerian appeasement to the Gods, it's still the same thing, even though the systems of belief or ideologies might not condone them. We don't need to understand the TRUE Sumerian worshipping rituals to know that what you've done is nonetheless STILL WRONG ANYWAY. America does not need to understand Islam, that it does not actually condone murder and that most Muslims are peace-loving, to know that there is a higher probability that people professing that faith might have extremist tendencies compared to those of other religions at this moment in time. Plain old observed events.

And somehow, I still don’t think that the solution to solve terrorism would fall in our laps after all CIA and Customs & Immigration officials read and understood the Koran thoroughly and even converted to Islam. If you yourself understand Islam so well, tell us how you plan to solve in problem of global terrorism. How does that religious knowledge give you the insight to pick out who amongst the throngs in the airports will decide to carry a bomb or hijack the cockpit in the name of Allah?

And you say:
There was once, a few Malaysians being stopped at America’s custom, due to the “bin” within their names. That shows how ignorant America is. Do not try to be a hero, if you do not know the truth, Uncle Sam!
What IS the truth, exactly? That people – seemingly normal as you and I - who have been educated in prestigious institutions within the United Kingdom, who have had millions in their bank accounts, who have led normal lives under the radar up to now, suddenly pop up from a flying school and hijack an aircraft for political weight? That it’s actually very easy to spot a terrorist? That only those with turbans, carrying a goat with them, walking in robes and sandals, bad teeth and bearded, should be the targeted suspects due to their disgruntled attitude to life? That those who could afford an education in the developed nations should never be included in the possible list of suspects who would be willing to commit mass murder? As you can see from the case Muhammad Atta and Co., and also the growing number of religious fanatics, extremism doesn’t afflict only a typical species of people. As I see it, the customs officials are merely doing profiling based on traits and groupings, in order to reduce the chances of being attacked. Sure it is tough in airports, but if you were in charge of security in your nation, what measures would you carry out? To be just and fair to everyone, and withhold all passengers for thorough luggage and background checks, till air traffic is at a standstill and so is the nation’s economy? The truth is, at this point in time, people under the label of ‘Muslims’, misguided or wrongly informed as they may be, are taking the spotlight on themselves as senseless mass murderers who have no other justification other than doing it “in the name of God”. Not I needed her life insurance, not I couldn’t take care of them any longer, not I was sick and tired of his abuse, not I wanted him to pay for what he did, not that’ll show them not to fire me, not even she had it coming to her a long time ago.

You also claim:
There is always an issue floating in the air of Islamic countries. Islamic countries should unite, as humans, specifically Muslims are in the same ummah. Muslims should show by action, that Islam is a peaceful religion, and real Muslims are not terrorist!

The only problem is, when Muslim countries unite, they adopt a “them against us” stance against the Western or non-Islamic nations. They try to unite, against the rest of the world, because the rest are all wrong, and the Islamic countries have more right and also the divine justification to decide how the world should be run. They have their own conferences, condemning the way Western nations run, using twisted logic to explain how developed nations don’t ‘truly’ have democracy or justice. How the Islamic world is being ‘encroached’ upon and their existence threatened. They unite but only to drive themselves further backwards into isolation from the rest of the global society and economy, because they are unable to accept that people who do not live lifestyles such as theirs have an equal right to freedom of choice as they do.

People should just embrace their religion, get their peace of mind that it provides them, and, to put it mildly (excuse the language): Shut The Fuck Up. You don’t have to meddle with what others believe in what they choose to do in life with respect to your religious principals.

Because once you start policing others based on their religious choices and lifestyles, everyone else has a right to do so. You start condemning someone for drinking, having pre-marital sex, not fasting - you are giving everyone else the right to also carry out religious or moral policing. Everyone accuses America of being the "World's Policeman". Noone accuses religious zealots of being "Humanity's Policeman". These narrow-minded people who have had their traditions, of oppression of women or suppression of basic rights to select castes or groups, so deeply entrenched within their culture that they are not willing to give it up even if it means putting family members at equal standing with equal rights (e.g. to have the freedom to choose their spouse). They start to merge everything within their lives into an amalgamation in order to provide the definition of The Epitome Of The Good And Righteous Life – the way things are supposed to be for everyone. They merge religion into governance of society. They feel that because they are part of a monotheistic religion that reinforces the notion that it and only it is the right path to salvation and eternal happiness, that they have the divine right to stand on the moral high ground and pronounce what should and shouldn’t be, what is wrong and what is not, with the rest of the world -which might or might not have a rat's ass to give about your faith.

Religion is no longer a system of faith and belief, it is now a weapon and tool used to create fear and submission to authority. If you go against me, you are going against the Big Guy up there, hah, tremble and cower in fear of me. Listen and do as I say, for the Big Guy is on my side, not everyone’s, just mine. Because I have a crest here see? It shows that I have more authority to speak on behalf of God than you puny mites do.

Freedom to worship does not only apply to those worshipping something, it applies to the freedom to not worship something. Please keep that in mind before dropping little gems on what people should and shouldn't do with their personal lives.

Well not you Loh, but I'm pissed off with these people who think that meddling with other people's affairs with Heaven and Hell will somehow score them more points to go to Heaven. You go to Heaven by managing your own life, not other people's.

12:34 AM


Thursday, September 10, 2009

Lots of people around the world still remember the sad moments started today (of course not 2009, but eight years ago). When the World Trade Centre collapsed to ashes, nightmare not only haunted Americans, yet citizens in Middle East. Warfare civilians may ask, “Are we the ones that do wrong?”

 World Trade Center

Since then, America treats Muslims like all are terrorist. America does not understand Islam. America is too arrogant in solving international tension. If invasion is allowed in country suspected with terrorism, why cannot other countries invade America? America thought they are civilised, but only barbarians love war. Am I right?

There was once, a few Malaysians being stopped at America’s custom, due to the “bin” within their names. That shows how ignorant America is. Do not try to be a hero, if you do not know the truth, Uncle Sam!

There is always an issue floating in the air of Islamic countries. Islamic countries should unite, as humans, specifically Muslims are in the same ummah. Muslims should show by action, that Islam is a peaceful religion, and real Muslims are not terrorist!

I am wondering, will America invade Malaysia or Indonesia someday? Lets think about it, on this 11th of September.

**Sky in Dunedin turns grey after few sunny days. Tomorrow is Biochemistry term test, which will kill me.

7:58 PM